Mary, it is Pamela from Eldoret. I held off writing because I wanted to be sure, and because privacy was the thing I worried about most when I first contacted you.
You will remember I asked a lot of questions before agreeing to anything. I did not want my name circulating and I did not want to be hurried. What reassured me was that nobody pushed. Ian was given my number only when I said I was ready.
He was polite from the first message and never once opened with a request for something. We met for lunch in Nakuru, roughly halfway for both of us, which I appreciated. He talked about his work, asked about mine, and the conversation never went anywhere I did not want it to go.
A month on, I am enjoying his company and the fact that neither of us is performing. What I would tell another woman is that the pace is yours to set. If someone makes you feel hurried, that is your answer.